Prescription for Change

In my novella, An Inn Decent Proposal, which appears in my anthology, KILLER KISSES, the heroine, a gourmet chef who wants her own kitchen, and hero, an ambitious hotelier, have an opportunity to bid on a rundown inn and restore it to its previous glory. Along the rock-strewn way to achieving this goal, they discover they need to make some changes in themselves, too, in order to achieve their happily ever after.

After a frenzied year of work and leisure activities, including over-scheduled vacations, exhaustion can take its toll. In addition to our overbooked lives, many of us are working at taking care of both children and parents–but not ourselves.  Even if your parents are independent and your children are grown, it is easy to fall into patterns of caregiving that are unhealthy.

Not only do we become spread too thin, but also we begin to stop enjoying things we once loved to do. When having sex becomes just another chore on your to do list, you need to take serious stock of your life. Sex is one of the great gifts of being alive at any age. Taking control of your time and life can re-energize your bedroom activities. My gift to you on the cusp of planning back-to-school, back to work, back to the hamster wheel, is to share this with you in the hopes that you will begin to take better care of yourselves, too.

SEVEN STEPS TO MAKING HEALTHY CHANGES

Step One: Admit that you have needs, too. We cannot be Wonder Woman all the time. If you crash, you can’t help anyone. Accept the idea that you need to take care of yourself. If you don’t take care of yourself, you will be useless to your dependents. It is not shameful to take care of yourself. You have needs, too. One of them is a healthy sex life.

Step Two: Write down what you need, physically, emotionally, spiritually. Get thee to a doctor. Get your regular checkups. Inform your personal physician if you are a caregiver when you go for medical appointments and inform your doctor of any special stress or issues you are facing. Ask what you can do to improve your sex life.

Step Three: Write down what you will do about getting your needs met. Henriette Klauser says, “When you care enough to write down your goals, stand back.” Writing your goals down makes them tangible and your subconscious continues to work on them, even when you forget about them. Make a contract with yourself to change unhealthy behaviors and to start new healthy ones. When you write your goals down, they are more likely to happen. Set goals and stick to them. Tell your family and friends what you are doing–and ask for their help. “I have a quit date for smoking. I need your help.” Or, “I want to get more exercise. Could you please come over and watch Mom so I can get out for a thirty minute walk?” Quitting smoking, eating healthy, getting exercise improve not only how you feel, but how you feel about your attractiveness. It also revs up your sex drive.  

Step Four: ASK FOR HELP. People may think you WANT to do it all. Allow others to help you. We can be our own worst enemies when it comes to asking for help. We feel as if we ought to be able to do it all, that it’s shameful to ask for help. If a friend or neighbor volunteers and says, “If there’s anything I can do, let me know,” say, “Yes, I would love it if…” and you fill in the blank. Of course, you should be reasonable in your requests. It is okay to ask for help, too. The worst thing that will happen is someone will say no. More likely, they will say yes. Perhaps you have trouble letting go of control? Delegating not easy for you? Maybe family and friends want to help, but are waiting for you to ask them. ASK!

Step Five: Take action. Do what you say you will do for yourself. Don’t keep putting it off. Let go of non-priority tasks and take on activities that make you healthy, physically and emotionally. Have a date night. Spend time with your partner and make it pleasurable. Go to dinner, watch a romantic movie, light candles, take a shower or bubble bath together. Turn on the mood music and get out those special massage oils.  Make an appointment for you and your lover and keep it. Do NOT fill up that space with something else. Put it on your Google calendar with lots of reminders.

Step Six: Write about how you feel about your actions. Journaling has been found to be an effective tool for stress reduction. Keep a diary to record and track your emotional status. Sometimes we try to tell ourselves everything is okay, when it really isn’t. Denying your feelings of loss, sadness, loneliness, or being overwhelmed does not make them go away. When you put something in writing, it forces you to acknowledge your feelings and can motivate you to do something to improve the situation.

Step Seven: Start OVER again with Step One. Over time this will become natural, but right now, it will feel awkward.

What tips do you have for taking care of yourself and your sex life?

While you think about your answer, here’s an excerpt from An Inn Decent Proposal, which appears in my anthology, KILLER KISSES

 Now do you admit that my cooking makes men weak at the knees?”

He crawled to her chair, reached up and pulled her face down to his and slanted his mouth over hers. “Yes,” he breathed. “You have made my knees—and other parts of my body weak.” He pressed his lips against hers and she responded, opening her mouth. She tasted like pomegranates. He wanted more of her flavors. Now.

He ran a hand down her neck and found a hardened nub awaiting his touch through the thin lace. He lowered his head to her breast and sucked at the cloth, pulling her into his mouth until she moaned. Then he moved to the other breast, but pulled the blouse down, exposing a claret-colored nipple the size of a silver dollar. He licked and sucked at that large, lovely rosebud until she clutched at his hair.

“Stop.” She panted. “We still have dessert.”

“You’re my dessert.”

“I’m not too fat for you?”

He looked up into her eyes, his tongue longing to return to sucking on that big bud. “Skinny women don’t turn me on. I love your curves, your hips, your big beautiful ass, your full, delicious breasts, and your sweet, succulent nipples. I want to explore every inch of your luscious lovely thighs, right up to your—”

She pushed away from him, stood and took his hand. He tried to pull her back but she shook her head, smiled, and dragged him down a hallway. Illuminated only by candles, her bedroom contained a queen-sized bed, large pillows, and red satin sheets. A cooking cart with a chafing dish stood ready to serve.

She turned to him. “Get undressed.”

As he ripped his shirt and pants off, she released her hair from her ponytail and peeled out of her lace top and slinky pants. She wore no underwear. He swept his gaze over her large breasts, full hips and the red triangle of hair he wanted to sample next. He stood at complete attention, pointing straight at her. He reached for Genie, grazed a breast, and she shoved him back onto the bed. “Lie down.”

He complied, shivers running up and down his spine.

Hair draping across her face, she stood over him and drizzled warm chocolate sauce on his chest, belly button, hips, and erection. Then she dropped dollops of whipped cream in swirls along the same pattern.

“Just so you know, this is all homemade.”

Bending her head over her work, she quickly licked from his neck down to his belly button, and then in a slow, deliberate pace, continued downward. He groaned and grew harder and thicker with each lick.

He grabbed Genie and pulled her onto the bed. “I’m hungry, too.”

A dish in each hand, he drew wild patterns with chocolate sauce and whipped cream across her lush curves. After eying his handiwork, he licked his lips. “I think I’ll start with these two delicious mounds topped with these bright, red cherries. Then, I’ll follow the chocolate trail down to here.”

He slid a chocolate covered finger into her moist folds, sliding across her center, flicking her until she wriggled and arched her hips upward. He smiled, withdrew his finger and licked it. “Delicious.”

Between gritted teeth, she gasped. “Tease.”

“Look who’s talking. You’ve been driving me wild all evening.” Jim licked his way down the chocolate path. The pool of sweet brown liquid in her navel and below required extra attention to detail, and he lapped up every drop, first licking lazy circles on her soft thighs. She grabbed his head and pushed him to her silky triangle. His tongue probed her saucy folds, then nibbled at her hard nub until she moaned, screamed his name, and clutched his hair.

“I want you inside me.”

He crawled on his elbows, maintaining skin contact with each upward movement. He looked deep into her eyes and slid inside her. She rose to meet him at every stroke, urged him onward, and let him know with her touches exactly what she wanted: harder, deeper, stronger thrusts. She shuddered and screamed his name, he couldn’t hold on any longer. He came with a shout and fell on top of her.

She looked him in the eye. “Ready for the cheese course?”

Food and Sex

Do I have your attention now?

Is there a connection between good food and good sex? The answer is a resounding yes, according to sources as diverse as Discovery Health and the Social Issues Research Center. Food is part of the dating and mating ritual across all cultures. Both food and mating are essential to the survival of the species. Feeding your mate is not only sexy, but also a way of saying, “I will take care of you forever.”

Some people may go a bit overboard combining food and sex, as this fun loving couple did. But, hey, it’s their groceries, who am I to criticize? One super food that has been strongly linked to super sex is chocolate. Yes, dare I say it? Women are programmed to love it because it gives us pleasure and makes us feel happy and sexy. Consider giving yourself and your mate the gift of chocolate–in the bedroom. Be imaginative. Play with your food! That’s what my couple did in An Inn Decent Proposal.

In An Inn Decent Proposal in my anthology, Killer Kisses, Genie King is a Culinary Institute of America trained chef who is piqued by her high school heart throb, Jim Rawlings, when he tells her that he’s sure she’s “a solid cook.” Furious, she retorts, “Tell you what, Mr. Critic, you come to my house for dinner tomorrow night. My food makes men go weak at the knees.” She proceeds to seduce him with her sensual cooking. Starting with a chef’s amuse-bouche and ending with a decadent dessert in the bedroom, Genie brings Jim to his knees and makes him beg for more.

Here’s an excerpt to whet your appetite.

With butterflies dancing the hoochie-koochie in his stomach, Jim stood on the front porch of Genie’s house at the appointed hour, clutching a dozen hot-pink roses, his finger poised to press the doorbell. A witch that appeared to have flown into the siding stuck out of the wall and cobwebs were draped over the light fixture.

Why was he so nervous? It was just dinner. Right? Visions of Genie’s teasing cleavage danced before his eyes. No. He wanted it to be more than dinner. A whole lot more. He took a deep breath and leaned on the bell.

Moments later, the object of his desire appeared framed by the doorway, fiery hair pulled up in a ponytail, her luscious breasts covered by a huge black apron that read, Never Trust a Skinny Chef.

He handed her the flowers. “Trick or treat?”

“Treat. Thanks. Come on in.” She stepped aside to give him room to pass.

He wanted to grab her in the doorway, drag her into the bedroom and take her right then and there. Down boy. No need to act like a Neanderthal. He cleared his throat. “Did you get a lot of kids?”

“About two dozen little ones with their parents. After dinner the teenagers came out in droves. Most of them weren’t even in costume. I ran out of candy bars and turned the light off at ten. What about you?”

“The Motel Seven wasn’t in the holiday spirit.” He grinned. “Just as well, I forgot my costume. The only thing I could have gone as was Adam.”

She blushed and said, “That would have been interesting.” She handed him a glass of champagne. “To celebrate our purchase, I thought we’d begin with a Perrier Jouet. And, since we seem to be in an Indian summer, we’re having appetizers on the patio.”

She led him through the living room under a cuckoo clock made to look like a green-and-red Swiss chalet. “Interesting timepiece you’ve got there.”

“My father gave it to my mother years ago, on their second date.” She opened the sliding glass door. “He wanted her to be reminded every hour of the day that he was cuckoo for her. Corny, hunh?”

He clinked her glass. “To corny love.”

She pointed to the small square white dishes on the glass topped patio table. “Tonight’s amuse bouche is salmon tartare on five-spice crisps.”

After he sat, she placed a cloth napkin on his lap. The simple motion aroused him. He shifted in his seat, grateful for the camouflage. He turned to the tasty morsels at hand, closed his eyes and crunched into what appeared to be a large wonton crisp—but with tastes of clove, peppercorn, cinnamon, fennel, and anise dancing on his tongue. Layered in with these flavors were salmon, wasabi, ginger, and a touch of spicy sushi sauce. He moaned, opened his eyes and saw Genie watching him.

He took a sip of champagne. “More please?”

“You may have two more—that’s it, or you won’t be able to enjoy the rest of the meal.”

He savored each bite and realized the chef was not on the patio with him. “Where’d you go?”

“Not to worry.” She appeared from another sliding glass door bearing a large platter covered with golden brown rings drizzled with a red sauce and garnished with something green. She placed the dish in front of him. “Sweet-and-spicy calamari, toasted peanuts, and cilantro.”

“Can taste buds explode?”

She inclined her head. “We shall see. Bon appétit.”

“Won’t you join me?”

She sank into a chair opposite from him. “Just for a few moments. I have kitchen duty, you know.”

“Yes, and I’m grateful.”

She smirked. “We’ll see how grateful in a while.”

Was that a signal? Was she coming on to him? His heart raced and his pants stirred. Focus on food, dammit. He reached for the calamari. Spicy sweet-and-sour flavors rioted with combined textures of crunchy light tempura batter and tender squid. He licked his fingers. “Dear God, please serve this in heaven.”

When Genie laughed, the smile reached all the way up to her sparkling eyes. “You approve?”

“Mmm. Yes. Why aren’t you married?”

She eyed him and took a sip of bubbly. “You first.”

“I was.” He grabbed another piece of calamari. “To a hot blonde blackjack dealer.” He crunched, savoring the flavors.

“And?”

“What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.”

“Not fair.”

“She left me for a higher roller. Your turn.”

She popped a piece of calamari into her mouth and ran her tongue around her lips slowly, getting every little crumb. His pants grew tighter. “Sommelier boyfriend became alcoholic.”

“Occupational hazard.”

She nodded. “I swore off romance for a while. Became best-friends-forevah with every gay guy in New York City. Lots of great shopping stories.” She sipped her wine. “Fell like King Kong diving off the Empire State Building for my new executive chef. Man was he hot.” She fanned herself.

A flash of jealousy surprised him. “And?”

“Hot, as in temper. As in throwing dishes, pots, anything at hand.” She shook her head. “He was Italian; I nicknamed him Mount Vesuvius. I left him and the job the day after he threw an iron skillet, missed me, and dented the wall.” She dusted her hands off. “That was that. He’s the reason I’m here.”

Jim reached over and grabbed her hand. Heat pulsed off her palm. “What’s his address? I’ll send him a thank-you note.”

She stood and gave him a Mona Lisa smile. “Save your thanks for when you’re done with dinner.”

That was definitely a come-on. He admired her lovely ass as she sashayed away and looked forward to the next courses.

As dusk fell, they moved into the dining room. She had placed the roses in a vase and set them on the buffet to the side. The table was set for two with fine china and glassware. Everything sparkled in the candlelight. She held a chair out for Jim, and once again placed a napkin on his lap, this time drawing out the ritual a tad longer. She was killing him. She breathed into his ear, sending frissons down his neck. “I hope you like the next course.”

Just to have something to hold onto—other than her—he clenched a soup spoon. And a white dish appeared in front of him in the center of which were large lumps of—

“Rich lobster soup with curry.” She poured a thick pink liquid around the lumps of shellfish.

The scent of curry rose on the steam grabbing his olfactory lobe, taking his brain to a new plane of existence. “Oh. My. God.”

“Some have likened my food to a religious experience.”

The lobster swam in the smooth soup with a hint of curry while his taste buds danced and sang hallelujah, hallelujah. “Any chance I could get this for dessert?”

She took her apron off and sat down. “Not tonight. I have other plans.”

The low cut lace top left little to Jim’s imagination. Torn between appetites, he wondered if there was an intermezzo. He needed to clear his palate—and knew just who he wanted to do it with.

Read the rest in Killer Kisses, available in Kindle or Print

 

Angels versus Demons: Who’s Sexier?

In celebration of Leia Shaw and Carrie Ann Ryan‘s new paranormal romance releases in June and July, we’re participating in an angel and demon themed blog hop! (Click here to go to Leia and Carrie’s blog).
Leia’s book, Destiny Bewitched, features a sexy as hell (pun intended) demon named Geo, and Carrie’s, Dust of My Wings, hero is an angel named Shade.

Angel and Demon sexy storiesWe were asked to let readers know which we’d rather have to…uh…cuddle up with at night – angels or demons? And what are our favorite angel or demon books? Since we have four authors on this blog, each of us has a different opinion and a different book. Here’s what the Sexy Romance Stories authors had to say. We’re giving away a Sexy Romance Story ebook to one lucky commenter! (Good all over the world!)

Jennifer Lynne: Do I prefer an angel or a demon? Hmm, if we’re talking about real life then I vote for an angel, but when it comes to fiction and the most delectable romance hero a woman could wish for, then my vote almost always goes to the demon lover! There’s just something about a bad boy that really gets to me – maybe it’s the possibility of redemption through the love of a good woman. Maybe it’s the promise – or delicious threat – of violence just at the edge of all that passion. Whatever it is, I love reading about bad boy heroes, and most of the time I like writing about them, too. My heroes usually have a dark side. While I haven’t created an actual demon or angel as yet, I do have a Greek god or three on offer! My Gods of Love series that began with menage a trois erotic romance, Platinum Passion, continues with the just-released transsexual romance, Aphrodite Calling. This erotic novella features Himeros, an ancient Greek god of sexual desire who knows exactly how to answer the call of need in every mortal who asks. Here’s a brief snippet that illustrates the complex light/dark aspect of his nature:

“We do have a couple of onlookers.”

His soft words, murmured into her hair, had her thighs tightening involuntarily around him as the burning excitement grew. Who was watching? And what show did they want to see? Straight sex between a man and a woman, or sex between two people who both had a penis?

Are you wondering if I really had the op? If there aren’t actually two hard dicks here right now, hidden by my skirt, sliding up and down against each other and dampening my panties with all that leaking pre-cum?

Too bad.

A sudden flare of anger ignited inside of her toward the peeping Toms, whoever they were, and she dug one of her heels into the crease of his ass, rubbing it up and down with just enough pressure to elicit a moan of protest from Himeros.

She stopped. “Sorry.”

“Ah, but I enjoy the lick of pain, Gina.”

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Roz Lee: Whether or not you believe actual angels and demons live among us, the concept is familiar. Demons are bad and angels are good. Demons influence us in dangerous way, and angels come along to guide us on a better path. Demons are destructive, and angels help us heal.

We’re all familiar with the sayings, the devil made me do it, and there was an angel on my shoulder. Most people don’t believe those in a literal sense, but refer to the battle of wills going on inside us on a daily basis. Sometimes it’s as simple as deciding to tell the cashier she gave you too much back in change or smiling at your good fortune and keeping your mouth shut. Other times, it’s deeper, darker.

In my current work in progress, Jason’s inner demons have served him well, giving him the drive and determination to overcome the odds and build a successful career in major league baseball. But on a personal level, those very same demons that make him such a good baseball player, manifest themselves through sexual needs Jason has long denied. With another failed relationship behind him, Jason is forced to confront his dark desires before they destroy him.

What does Jason need here? An angel, of course! He finds one in Carrie, a woman who understands and accepts his dark side. She brings light to the dark corners of Jason’s life, and through her he finds a way to express himself in a constructive way. She’s the angel he needs to balance the demon inside him. Their relationship isn’t without conflict, but with the help of his angel, Jason will finally put some demons to rest.

Look for Jason’s story, the second book in the Mustangs Baseball series, later this year. Here’s a snippet –

Jason took a few moments to get his head screwed on right as he watched his new sub through the glass. She’d followed his instructions to the letter. Wearing white lace panties and bra, she looked like an angel, minus the wings. He’d have to reward her before he took her to task for disobeying him the night before.

After tonight’s game, nothing would please him more than to give this angel an orgasm she’d never forget, then sink his cock into her heavenly heat. But that wasn’t going to happen. No orgasm for her, and the one he had planned for himself would be fun, but nowhere near as satisfying as he’d hoped. He reminded himself that he was in this to build a lasting relationship, and in the grand scheme of things, one more day wasn’t much to set the right tone.

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Chellesie B. Dancer: Some people are mostly angels, and others are pure demons, but in my upcoming erotic novella “Restless,” free-spirited Cassie has both competing in her head. She’s had the same devoted husband for seven years.  They’ve lived in the same lovely house for six.  And she’s had the same practical career even longer. At thirty years old, Cassie is restless–there’s a hot wind blowing through her that just won’t be satisfied. Then her husband loses his job, his confidence, and his libido. Her inner demon grows stronger and Cassie indulges in some risky flirtations, but her inner angel keeps her mindful of her beloved husband. When a dark enigmatic stranger moves into their home, the devil inside makes her body burn for him. Can she stay cool-headed and loyal, or will she let the fire engulf her? Can her husband accept that his angel is equal parts devil? What happens if she gives in to both?

“You like to watch me, don’t you?”
Taken aback, he just nodded his head. This was the perfect opportunity to try her plan.
“Do you ever…imagine…that it’s you I’m with?”
Long pause. His shoulders were clenched so tight his neck disappeared.
She mentally kicked herself for going too far, but knew enough to keep her mouth shut.
“I don’t mess with married women.”
BINGO!  He was attracted to her and he’d practically admitted it. “Of course not, and I wouldn’t cheat on my husband…”
His shoulders relaxed, and he took a breath.
“Not even with a tempting hunk like you.” She lowered her eyelids seductively as she smiled.

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Sharon Buchbinder: Women, especially strong women, struggle with how they are perceived by men. At times woman are demons, at other times angels. One of the earliest known she demons identified in Sumerian and Kabbalistic Judaism is the seductress and succubus, Lilith. The first wife of Adam, Lilith was his equal in every way. She had no desire to be bossed around by him, so she left Adam and Eden for more interesting company, male demons who hung out around the Red Sea. Apparently, the demons wrote on cave walls, “For a good time, call Lilith!” She coupled with them all and bore hordes of demon babies.

The flip side of the coin is the maternal, angelic being, also from the Kabbalistic literature, the Matronit. This powerful female figure was considered God’s wife. When Israel was threatened, she became a warrior goddess, one capable of riding blazing chariots and destroying armies to defend her chosen ones. But when the second Temple was destroyed, the Matronit grieved and left God to go off on her own until her nation repented and was restored to glory. In the interim, Lilith gives solace to God, because after all, he is a male with needs.

When I wrote Desire and Deception, I wanted to have a strong villainess, a man-eating woman, who also had a side the reader could empathize with. Isabel Ramirez is haunted by her duality–she is Lilith to some and the Matronit to others. She struggles with this duality until she finds a man who loves sees the angel hiding behind the demon within her. Here’s a snippet from DESIRE AND DECEPTION that depicts Isabel’s conflict between seductress and mother.

A hard slap landed on her ass with a cracking sound.

About fucking time he got it right. “Yes! Give me ten like that!” The noise of slaps blended with the scent of her arousal and his grunts with each smack. He rubbed his erection between her legs, touching her wet lips, pressing them apart. She shook her head and panted. “Not yet.” At last when the stinging crescendo hit the right peak, she shouted, “Now, Sean, now!”

He plunged deep inside her.

Her breath came in ragged bursts. “Harder.”

Sean complied with faster, deeper thrusts. Her thighs banged against the desk with each push. She pulled his hands around to her breasts, and placed them on her rigid nipples. “Pinch me.”

He twisted her nipples and thrust harder. She screamed, Sean groaned, shuddered, and fell against her back and hugged her close to him.

Isabel pushed him away. “Get off me.” She handed him a wad of tissues. “Clean me up, and make it snappy. I have to get home before my husband decides to fuck the nanny.”

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We hope you enjoyed our snippets. Now tell us a bit about your preference: Angel or Demon?

Leave a comment to enter to win one of two Grand Prizes – A Kindle Touch or a $60 Amazon or Barnes & Noble Gift Card – or you could win an eBook from one of the lovely ladies at Sexy Romance Stories! Don’t forget to leave your email address – just in case!

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Horrible Warning or Good Example?

Jezebel.

Why is it that this name is often associated with the following epithets: whore, slut, evil, harlot, seductress, scheming, manipulative, and murderess? How many of us have actually read that portion of the Hebrew Bible closely? I hadn’t until recently when I picked up Alice Ogden Bellis’ book, Helpmates, Harlots and Heroes: Women’s Stories in the Hebrew Bible.  Bellis’ book is an eye-opening, feminist review of women’s stories in the Hebrew Bible. The author employs the latest critical thinking in feminist literature while simultaneously reminding the reader of the realities of women’s lives in that era, as well as the fact that men wrote the bible.

Warning: If you are offended by feminist interpretations of biblical tales, don’t read the rest of this post.

Here’s the real deal about Jezebel: she was Queen of Israel and came from a different kingdom. She was an outsider, a daughter of the King of the Sidonians.  An independent and strong woman, she brought her religion with her to the marriage. She worshipped Asherah (the goddess found in many cultures of that time) and Baal, the son of Asherah.  Elijah, the prophet, told everyone to abandon their idols for Yahweh. At the time, Yahweh was a new concept, an invisible god, competing with a lot of other visible gods and goddesses.* Elijah called upon Yahweh to destroy the false prophets. This was in no small part because Queen Jezebel had already knocked off a bunch of Elijah’s followers. These were not forgiving people, nor were these accepting times. The power struggle between Queen Jezebel and Elijah was a fight to the death.

1 Kings 18:19 Now therefore send, [and] gather to me all Israel unto mount  Carmel, and the prophets  of Baal four hundred  and fifty, and the prophets of the groves four hundred, which eat at Jezebel’s  table.  (The Blue Letter Bible http://www.blueletterbible.org/Bible.cfm?b=1Ki&c=18&t=KJV#19)

Only the prophets of Baal were destroyed–none of the “prophets of the groves,” i.e., the goddess, Asherah. Elijah declared himself and Yahweh the winner.  But, Jezebel  was one tough cookie. You had to be to survive in those times. When she saw her husband, King Ahab, was depressed because he couldn’t  buy some land from two men, she arranged to have the men killed via the council of elders’ decree. (Some experts suggest she was not behind this move, that it was King Ahab’s action). Her husband got the vineyards and lands.  Years later, after King Ahab dies, the son of one of the men she had killed for his vineyards became the new ruler. Elijah backed the new king. When Jezebel realized she was about to die, she put on her make-up and fine clothing, looked out the window at the mob below and spoke to them defiantly.  Three eunuchs grabbed her, threw her to her death, and then she was trampled by a horse. When someone called for a decent burial, all they could find was her skull and a few bones. Elijah wanted this woman and her influence completely erased. He said to let the dogs feast on her. He also said:

1 Kings 9:37 And the carcass of Jezebel shall be as dung upon the face of the field in the portion of Jezreel; [so] that they shall not say, This [is] Jezebel. (The Blue Letter Bible http://www.blueletterbible.org/Bible.cfm?b=2Ki&c=9&t=KJV#30)

Elijah clearly did not want a martyr’s grave.

The early kings did not acquire their thrones and kingdoms by being nice. They took things by force and grew alliances through marriage, which is one of the reasons Jezebel was married off to King Ahab. She was the daughter of a powerful ruler. She was also a pawn in a biblical game of thrones. Yes, Jezebel was scheming, manipulative, and possibly murderous, because her husband’s throne was at stake. There is no evidence that she was a harlot, whore, slut or seductress. Was she evil? Were her actions any different from the men of the times? Or was she deemed evil because she was a woman? Take a moment to reflect on how King David sent Uriah to the front to be killed after Bathsheba became pregnant. Yet, David is still held up as a role model and Jezebel as a terrible example. In a patriarchy, women are not supposed to think, have power, or do anything except have male babies and obey their husbands. Have times really changed that much?

As I listened to the sound bites and followed the Rush Limbaugh/Sandra Fluke controversy , it occurred to me that many of the same epithets used against Queen Jezebel were used against a modern woman, a learned woman, a law student. When all else fails, it seems, some men will call a woman a slut. So, what do you think of Jezebel? Horrible warning or good example of a strong woman living in tough times?

(* Raphael Patai, biblical scholar and author of The Hebrew Goddess writes about the archaeological support for the idea that Asherah and Yahweh were a divine couple who lived a peaceful and loving co-existence in the Temple of Solomon. But that’s another post for another time.)

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PS: When I wrote DESIRE AND DECEPTION , I purposely chose the name Isabel for one of my heroines because of its similarity in sound to Jezebel. Here’s a link to the sexy book trailer for this erotic read.

Does Erotica Empower Women? Or Do Empowered Women Read and Write Erotica?

From my childhood through my young adulthood, my mother wore the mask of the “Perfect Mother, Girl Scout Troop Leader, and Sunday School Teacher.” But her behavior when at home, away from the scrutiny of other adults, was anything but perfect. One of the first short stories for which I won an honorable mention from Spinetingler Magazine (yes, horror!) was called Goody Two Shoes. It was my first public foray into exploring the roles women play and the masks women wear.

My full length erotic romantic suspense novel, Desire and Deception, explores these same themes. Similar in heat levels to noir movies like Body Heat and The Postman Always Rings Twice, my story differs from these notable examples because it ends on an upbeat note. In Desire and Deception, polar opposites sex siren Isabel (Izzy) Ramirez and goody-two-shoes Sarah Wright-Rosen become fast friends and seem destined to be BFFs until Izzy’s terrible secret is unearthed–literally and figuratively. Convinced she is unworthy of redemption, because she believes she cannot be anything but the “bad girl,” Izzy goes down a take no prisoners’ path, halted only by her younger lover, Sean Richards.

For her part, having been raised by an alcoholic in a “you’re-only-good-if-you-enable-me” paradigm, Sarah discovers shades of gray in her formerly black and white world. She also learns the powers of forgiveness and love can transform not only how she sees the world, but also her own self-image. In the end, Izzy becomes more like “good girl” Sarah–and Sarah becomes more like her “bad girl” friend. Izzy is the larger than life embodiment of all that is forbidden to “good girls.” Izzy embraces her sexuality and desires, takes control of her life and the men in it, and pleases herself. Sarah is “everywoman;” she works hard, plays by the rules, collaborates and facilitates consensus. She believes she can only be “good” one way, i.e., by constantly trying to please others.

This binary, yes/no reasoning is faulty, but I believe many women struggle with this duality in our lives. The question is not to be or not to be, but who are we supposed to be versus who do we want to be? Our role models may or may not be good ones, depending on how healthy our parents’ upbringing was. If you come from a dysfunctional household, one with crime spoken daily, can you break out of that mold? Or are you ever going to be able to explode from those constraints? Likewise, if your home appeared to be the epitome of perfection to the outside world, but was hell behind closed doors, can you ever overcome the damages of a self-righteous hypocrite?  Izzy and Sarah discover their true selves through the redemptive power of love and realize that they can be what they want to be, in spite of their pasts.

In writing Desire and Deception, I wanted to tell a sexy suspenseful tale about smart, powerful women and the men who love them. I wrote about society’s expectations of what a woman should be versus what a woman wants to be. And since the standing advice to writers is to “write what you know,” I then placed these characters into the setting I knew well, the rigidly hierarchical academic world where tenure and promotion are the duo brass rings. With Isabel and Sarah chattering at me the entire time, Desire and Deception is a story that practically wrote itself.

I am fascinated by powerful women. By making her the pampered princess, daughter of a Mexican crime boss, I was able to make her a modern day woman warrior who lives by her own rules. In her non-fiction book, The Warrior Queens, Antonia Fraser analyzes the lives of real women who led in times of war. Fraser looks at the historical data, legends and myths surrounding these women through a modern lens. She gives a list of adjectives and categories that men create for these astonishing, strong females, one of which is the lustful “Voracity Syndrome,” aka the “Man Eater.” Izzy is the archetypal Man Eater: smart, sexy, sassy, funny and deadly. Female and male readers can live vicariously through Isabel because she embodies all the things women are told not to do. Don’t be too smart. Don’t be too aggressive. Don’t put your desires ahead of other people’s wants and needs. Don’t talk back. Don’t enjoy sex. Don’t be in charge in the bedroom. Don’t be in control of your life. In other words: DON’T BE EMPOWERED. I made Isabel over-the-top on all of these traits and more, because she had to be strong to endure her early life and to lead her troops.

Like Meadow Soprano, Izzy grew up with all the privileges of being the mob boss’s daughter.  She was given the best of everything: nannies, schools, clothes, cars, horse-riding lessons, whatever her parents thought would make her more cultured. She was also given the worst of everything: horrible role models, a Machiavellian world view, and a very dark childhood secret that no child should ever have to carry with her. Because of this complex background, she becomes a female warrior in her own right. Where others would collapse, she survives and thrives. She is a flawed heroine–with redeeming qualities and compelling reasons for her behaviors.

Here is an example of Isabel’s empowered behavior:

After swinging by the daycare center, Isabel headed to the grocery store with the three kids. Ramon pushed a grocery cart, and the girls ran up and down the aisles shrieking. Enamored with all things chocolate, the twins stood in the middle of the candy aisle, yanked bags off the shelves and tossed them into the basket. Serious-faced, Ramon placed boxes of kid tested, mother approved cereal on top of the candy. Sometimes that boy looked like an undertaker. Isabel shook her head, pushed another cart with the adult purchases, and ignored the pointed stares of the other shoppers.

An elderly woman approached her with a dour expression. “Young lady,” she shook her finger at Isabel, “Don’t you know how harmful all that sugar is for children?”

Isabel gave the crone her favorite look reserved for morons and meddlers. “Old lady, don’t you know how harmful it is to interfere with a child’s self-expression? Who wants to grow up and be an uptight rectal sphincter like you?” She laughed out loud at the woman’s face, an excellent impression of a fish gasping for breath. “Dictionaries, aisle ten.” Isabel turned on her heel and continued shopping.

The woman sputtered behind her. “Why you cheeky–”

Isabel flipped the bird in the air and kept walking. She arrived at the checkout and turned to Ramon. “Pick out three boxes of cereal and one bag of candy. Ditch the cart in the produce section.” Now on their third lap around the store, Sherry and Ruby appeared to be slowing down. “Get your sisters. We’re outta here. I have to make another stop.”

I bet every mother who reads this has been there. Your kid(s) are rambunctious, but not really evil, you’re minding your own business and some busy body decides to give you a lecture about child-rearing. Can you honestly say you never wanted to respond that way and give the meddler the finger? And I love the scene from the perspective of the character’s growth. Izzy has had a nanny for her brood for quite some time. Now she’s forced into taking care of them and is becoming more attached to them and more protective of them. She has a maternal side to her that she never expected. She grows and continues to grow. In her own weird way, Izzy is protective of her brood and is working on being a good mother.

Looking back in your lives, have you seen yourself in either of these roles: people-pleaser or empowered woman? How do you think you were encouraged (or programmed) for these roles? Do you think erotica helps to empower women? Or do you think empowered women read and write erotica? Which came first? The chicken or the egg?  What do you think is the best way we can help ourselves and other women to become empowered?